long lists of things

its sunday afternoon now and im just sitting down to get things done. i went to the electronic store this morning with my dad and jens to go get some things with our gift cards. we got the gift cards last night, at my dads office party, it was really nice. i bought a brian eno and a wilco CD, i was listening to them in the car and sort of wished i had picked something else out. im probably going to have these CDs and listen to them for the next months until the CD burner is fixed, it might have been a good idea to get something funner. i had a calvin harris CD in hand, too, but there wasnt much else, as Best Buy has a pretty poor CD collection. the names of the rappers CDs are always very funny,though.

after that we went to the bonsall farmers market, where i saw some people i knew. i bought a very yummy burrito, and tried alot of free samples. jens ate a whole bunch of grapes! i started getting very grouchy after an hour, though. id been out of the house all day but with alot of work to get done, and i arrived home at about two.

lucy my dog has been sneezing terribly for the last three days, its sad. i think she has something trapped inside her nose. i felt awful because there was nothing i could say to help her or anything. i love our animals,though. xena the mighty mouser slept with me on my bed while i watched the Shining. she was doing funny things like mewing in her sleep and snoring and holding her breath, then she would wrap her paws around her face and shake her little head, like she was trying to keep the light out. i envy my cat, but i think we have an interesting relationship. i think she likes me alot like i like her, i think she understands me. she can understand what im saying too. not like we can communicate, but she can hear my tone and when i say something to her, well make eye contact for a few seconds. its strange when an animal looks at you, but really looks and watches and observes you, and you wonder what theyre thinking. its strange to think that im worth the time to watch, and theat they are actually interested in what im doing.

ive been playing with all sorts of colors on all sorts of things.


i spent an evening with bryan this wednesday, and a man told him if bryan didnt marry me, he would. pier dwellers are always charming. I made some really tasty cookies the day before, and brought them with me. i woke up hungover and sad the next morning, and gobbled down all of the leftovers, down to the last crumb.

the conversations i was having with the cute internet boys have stopped, and to tell ya the truth im not too dissapointed. even if theyre huge hunks, i dont wanna get down to temecula every weekend. im saving all of my love juice for some other town, when i move far, far away, and ill meet somebody fabulous i bet. i dont miss people very much, the only thing that made me sad was that ill probably spend my seventeenth birthday all by myself. and thats not even so bad, but id get to thinkin about it and it would spiral into a bunch of sad feelings that will take weeks to get over. ..

ill create cool characters to be my invisible friends. i would want a friend who has a car, just cause that makes things easier. they should wear glasses and have me over for sleepovers. they would have a cool job like a lifeguard, and get me in places for free, and we could go swimmin all the time. my friend would have a trampoline and be very funny, and just as cheap as i am. they would be lazy like me, too, so that nobody would try to drag me off the couch while im recovering from eating a pan of brownies. they would have lots of tea in their house like me, so wed always be caffeinated and talking, and theyd be smarter than me, so we could talk alot, and they could think of more things to say instead of me. i would want my friend to be a cool ethnicity, so their parents could teach me cool things and i could try new foods. they would have a big big big coat collection that we could lay in. they would also play all of my board games with me. wed buy an aquarium and fill it with fish and name them after our teachers. wed have boyfriends together, too. i dont know why i would want this person to have glasses. probably because it would make them alot more interesting looking. i feel bad about writing this stuff.

i dont think people like that really exist. and even if i have a frame of things i would want a person to be, i couldnt possibly think up the real person that would fill up all the gaps.id probably want a boyfriend thats like that, more than a friend, because with friends you can complain about them and with boyfriends you never want to, and if i had a friend like that id probably end up falling in love with them.hahaha.

mabye thats why i like my cat so much, cause i can pretty much make up her whole life.


im feeling very perky today, as soon as im done with this homework im going to put on a coat and go for a long walk.

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