i went to yoga class this morning, but i almost forgot. i was going garage-saling with mom, and at 8:32 i remembered that i needed to be at school at nine. it was really fun anyway, except when he tells us to massage our kidneys- that grosses me out. makes me wanna just about throw up.
other than that, id rather not be awake today, horoscopes are all proving to be very very true and insightful, im feeling confused, im feeling sad...all of these thngs. i should heed their warnings. todays was pretty amazing. i do feel like im running around in circles in my mind, im feeling the same things and im angry about the same things, i feel trapped and i feel like im also doing it to myself, the issue is i cant distinguish between what are controllable and what are sub-consious reactions to things, and its making things difficult to sort out with my thinking mind, its hard to pick, and im making bad decisions. i hate this part of my life, im very very confused. there always is an easy way out and its always an option, its just a matter of when i choose to use up those cards, one day i wont have any left, and i cant train myself to think that way. i can get myself to think pretty much anything.
yoga class makes me want that amy's vegan pizza i had last week, but i know id only just eat the whole thing again.
id like to not have school anymore, id work the rest of my life every day, i dont care, just get me out of here. no more algebra, no more biology, id rather live in a cardboard box.
one cup to keep me up, one cup to keep me warm. why two? i like my little teacups more than my parents big fatties.